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Visit with Paula Deen

Many of you may remember my blog about Paula Deen’s fall from favor last summer. I thought the attacks were highly vicious and unfair. Political correctness gone amuck. If we are all held publicly accountable for things we said 30 years ago, we’d be in sad shape. I knew at the time Paula Deen was no racist but the media decided she was and blew it all out of proportion. I was sad for her. My heart ached.

I didn’t know her and didn’t really know how to get hold of her. So, you may remember, I wrote an “open letter” to her last year. In March I went to Hilton Head and so wrote to her, presumptuously, that I’d love to drive to Savannah to meet her. No agenda, just show support and try to be an encouragement. It wasn’t possible at the time.

Last week I drove to Nashville with my daughter and her four children to visit dear friends who have moved there. It’s a long drive but the kids were so very good. My daughter was like a woman possessed! She was determined to get to Nashville in eight hours. And we did!

It was a fun trip. This is a 3 generational friendship…I have know these folks for 40+ years. I met them when I was living in Pennsylvania and expecting my oldest. The Lembrights are special to us – and well worth the 8 hour drive. Their daughter and 3 kids were visiting from California. We kept the kids busy and exhausted. One day we took all 7 kids to Franklin to eat at Maridee’s – it will never be the same! Fortunately my friend spent 30+ years as a first grade teacher so knew all about “crowd control”.

While waiting for lunch in Maridee’s I got a text from my business partner’s granddaughter who said, “Exciting news. Call me”. I planned to call after lunch. She then rang me on my phone so I took it. She told me Paula Deen was going to be in Pigeon Forge, TN to do a cooking show and she had contacted Paula Deen’s people. She mentioned my name and they said they’d love to have us come to the show on Sunday night and meet her.

Not a celebrity hound, I was a bit reluctant. But made arrangements to drive to Pigeon Forge – had to rent a car since my daughter had to drive on back to Virginia with the four children for a Monday event. (Did you know one-way rentals are outrageous. Hertz wanted $1000!! I used Enterprise for considerably less.) I was not happy with her driving alone but she is more than independent and capable. As they left, I “threatened” the kids to be good on the drive home!

I arrived in time at Pigeon Forge along with half the population of the East Coast! We were met by her delightful assistant who took us to a back room to wait for Paula – she was doing a “meet and greet” plus she is having difficulty with her eyes and needed some rest. Her Aunt Peggy came as did her good friend “Bubbles” and two very nice business associates who handle her food products. Such nice people! Sometimes the people around a celebrity can be really obnoxious. They couldn’t have been warmer or more delightful.

Paula eventually came we we had a good visit. She loves my aprons!! She is adorable and exceedingly gracious – as is her husband, Michael! She is as cute in person as she is on TV. We all fell in love with each one we met.

The show was great fun – we had a blast. And were able to meet with her after the show. Not sure where she gets her energy!

Please pray that she be able to get the rest she needs and her eyes heal – completely.

As I have said so many times, God loves to restore. And He is restoring Paula after a terrible episode in her life. With her new venture, I pray she will enjoy every success!

Paula Deen & Michael

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Learn from our Mistakes

This is by a “contributing editor”, Noelle D., my daughter.
In sharing her story and mistakes she wants to help others avoid the pitfalls. She has been remarkable through this and a testament of grace.

So You Want to Remodel….
(read this first)

I was awakened at 5:15 on a Friday morning by my son saying, “Mom, there is water coming in my room.” He was right, it was raining outside and water was coming in through the window but not only in his room, but every window in the rear of the house. Before long, water was pouring through the master bedroom ceiling fan. By then, I had a bucket and was dumping it every five minutes as the water continued to pour in. By the time the rain stopped outside, all but three rooms in the house had water seeping in them. Water even trickled down the basement walls.

A week earlier, my husband, Maury, and I had hired our next-door neighbor (whom I will call John and his wife Sue) to do repairs. They told us they had a licensed and insured construction company and could replace our roof and gutters. We took him at his word and did not verify his business license or insurance. His estimate for replacing our roof was less than the other estimates. He justified this by stating he was giving us a break since we were neighbors. His estimate was $7500 (keep this number in mind).

Our neighbor began replacing our roof on a Monday. By Thursday, John and his crew were still taking the shingles off, and the forecast now called for rain late Thursday night into Friday morning. He tarped the front roof of the house but failed to tarp the back roof of the house which was exposed – no shingles or tar paper, just roof decking. The rain came. Water poured in everywhere – attic, master bath and bedroom, boys room, upstairs hallway, HVAC ductwork, kitchen, downstairs bath, living room, study, sun porch, even trickling down to the basement’s back wall.

John came over first thing that Friday morning. He apologized profusely and stated he and his insurance company would take care of the damage and make our house better than it was before. At this point my husband and I were dumbfounded and overwhelmed. We had four kids, ages 9, 6, 4, and 2 at the time and homeschooling one of them. Also, our house was on the market – one reason we decided to re-roff in the first place. What were we going to do?

Later that morning as I was downstairs, there was a loud “BOOM!” I rushed upstairs and attempted to get into the master bedroom. As pushed the door open, I realized the master bedroom ceiling had fallen (the ceiling was made of plaster), thankfully missing my husband and our four-poster bed by 3 feet, but damaging other furniture.

In the afternoon, John’s insurance came to assess the damage. The agent informed me that the insurance would accept this claim and our living expenses would be covered. However, I was not informed of my options: Could we use another contractor to make repairs? How long would this take? Should I call my homeowners insurance? It was my understanding after meeting with the insurance agent that my only option for a contractor was John. Therefore, the contractor that was negligent and caused the original damage was now the same contractor repairing the house. (Fox guarding the henhouse comes to mind.)

John said Maury and I needed to pack up the house. The rear of the house needed to be gutted due to the water damage – the attic, master bedroom and bath, boys’ room, back wall of the first floor which included a bathroom, living room and kitchen.

He stated it would take two weeks to put the house back together as he was pulling crews from other jobs, making our house his priority. We made living arrangements accordingly.

The next eight weeks (not two) were nothing but manipulation and deception, which included the police being called on two separate occasions because of fierce arguments between John and his crew. Crews were not pulled from other job sites, as there were no other job sites. Each day there were different workers at the house, who were not allowed to talk to Maury or me.

Replacing our roof took three additional weeks. What was supposed to cost us $7500 cost another $3500 due to “damaged roof decking.”

John stated that he had spent $20K on replacing our kitchen cabinets. A disagreement between he and the cabinet company ensued with the cabinet company threatening to put a lien on our home. Maury talked to the cabinet company directly and found out that the cabinets were builder grade cabinets and that he only spent $9000 on them. When John found out that Maury was going directly to the cabinet company himself to deal with this dispute, his wife Sue texted the cabinet company and told them to not tell Maury how much they spent on the cabinets.

Maury and I questioned whether permits needed to be pulled for the construction. John stated that he was working with the insurance company to get permits. The insurance company stated John should have been pulling them all along!

John pitted the insurance agent against Maury and me, often telling the agent one story about us and bemoaning the actions of the agent to us.

The final straw was when John stated he needed the final payment from the insurance company. He claimed his brother was sick in Florida and that he was going to be traveling for a week. Maury and I had grave concerns and stated we would not sign any release forms until the house was finished. John got his final payment directly from the insurance company.

He did not go to Florida to see his “sick brother.”

Finishing our house became a low priority as two weeks had passed after receiving the final payment and the repairs on our house were still not completed.

Finally, we had enough and fired John.

At this point Maury and I contacted the insurance agent, he shut us down and quit communicating. We asked if we could have documentation of John’s license. The insurance company said we could walk next door and get documentation directly from John. We never got documentation of John’s license from him or the insurance company. John was not a licensed contractor!

The next six months became an arduous process of seeking legal counsel, going to the Better Business Bureau and State Insurance Commission, documenting all the damage and repairs that had yet to be done and then getting the repairs done correctly by another contractor. Almost everything John had repaired had to be re-done — permits had to be pulled, a structural engineer had to be called, hardwood floors had to be refinished, gutters had to be replaced, kitchen cabinets reset, electrical outlets that were once grounded were no longer, kitchen plumbing that had been to code was no longer and was leaking, and the list continued on and on. It was not until the beginning of January 2014 that we finished repairs on the house.

Where were we living during all of this? Since we were told repairing the house would take two weeks, we made temporary living arrangements. Since the process was prolonged, we ended up jumping from place to place. One week at my mother’s, two and a half weeks in North Carolina (while Maury stayed behind for work), ten days in a cabin at a campground, and then another three weeks at my mother’s house. This past fall we lived in the house while the repairs were going on.

There was a period of 10 days in which we did not have a working kitchen.

Then we had to move all our furniture in the rooms that did not have wood floors so we could refinish the ones that did. We were out of the house for another week. It was not until the beginning of January 2014, almost nine months from the original water damage that the repairs to the house were completed.

In this process, Maury and I tried to keep a sense of normalcy for the children.

They did not feel secure, were anxious, and had nightmares (which just recently stopped). It did not help that during all this upheaval that our cat died. She was an older cat and the stress of the construction process proved too much!

We had to seek professional counseling for one of our sons due to his anxiety.

Others losses we incurred: We lost the Spring season for the Real Estate market as the house had to be taken off. Maury lost work days in order to help deal with the mess. Homeschooling was interrupted. We had huge financial losses – thousands of dollars in legal fees not to mention getting the house to repaired correctly.

No doubt, we learned a lot from this whole experience, and that’s what we wanted to share with you. So, if you’re thinking about remodeling your home or having any sort of major repairs done, ask yourself several questions and follow some simple rules:

1) Get 2-3 quotes for the work to be done.
2) Get references on all the contractors who gave you quotes, but pay special attention to and check those that make the ‘final cut’ and will be doing the work.
3) Ensure that your contractor is pulling the appropriate permits for any work being done on your home.
4) Ask for the contractor’s license and insurance documentation and then check on the State’s DPOR website to ensure that the license is still in force.
5) In the state of Virginia, if a dispute arises between entities in a contract, each one is responsible for their own legal fees. Therefore when writing a contract, specify that if dispute should arise, the losing party pays for the legal costs of both parties.
6) If you have damages, especially those caused by a contractor working for you, be sure to immediately contact your own insurance company and report the incident.

I hope this helps…

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Should Evangelicals Condemn Homosexuals?

It seems that the issue of homosexuality has been front and center – of politics, healthcare, churches…almost everywhere.

I think it is a smokescreen meant to divide.

Especially in the Church. I saw it happen in my own local church. The issue thrown around which got everyone all riled up was “homosexuality” but that wasn’t the real issue. Since everyone was all stirred up, they couldn’t see the real issue. It was very sad but it is happening all over this country in many and varied ways.

I don’t believe the role of politics is to rewrite history or undermine traditional values. I don’t think government should be in my medical file or overrule my doctor’s educated wisdom of my care. The Churches’ main concern is for the Gospel – in all areas. The Gospel is good news for personal faith and salvation. It brings good news to politics as people are drawn together to solve problems honestly and with equity. It brings good news to health care as it leads the way in mercy.(There was no concern for the poor and infirmed before the Gospel.) But its business is not condemnation. The Gospel is good news for sinners of every stripe and shape.

“Run, John, run, the law commands

But gives me neither feet nor hands.

Far grander news the Gospel brings.

It bid me fly and gives me wings.”

John Erskine or John Bunyan

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Above Our Means

I am writing at my desk as my oldest daughter is in the kitchen homeschooling 2 very reluctant children that would rather be playing outside. Their negative persistence is remarkable as is her positive patience! It illustrates for me this truth:

The world is in turmoil. (Just like my grandchildren!) That is not really new. The speed with which the world is changing is new – and can be frightening.

The US President just reversed the policy of not negotiating with terrorists, releasing 5 dangerous men; a US Marine languishes in jail in Mexico; little girls are deciding they want to be boys and parents post the story on Facebook; veterans are dying as they await medical treatment; an ambassador is brutalized and killed in the line of duty; we find it hard to believe what the government and the President say; energy and food costs are climbing, as is the jobless rate… Rather a grim picture.

But we have treasures. We have promises.

The Apostle Paul wrote in II Corinthians 1:20, “All the promises of God in him (Jesus) are yes and in him (Jesus) Amen, unto the glory of God by us…”

The Amplified Bible says it this way: “For as many as are the promises of God, they all find their Yes (answer) in Him (Christ). For this reason we also utter the Amen (so be it) to God through Him – that is His Person and by His agency – to the glory of God.”

Ponder that a bit. All the promises – as many as there are. How many is that?

All the promises are answered affirmatively in Jesus.

We have the opportunity to put those promises into operation in our lives to the glory of God and His purposes. As we cooperate with Christ and God’s promises a whole treasure trove opens to us!

Think of the many promises of grace, peace, mercy, rest, strength, encouragement, forgiveness, protection, supply…you name it. It is all found in Jesus affirmatively. Not for our pleasure or ease but for the glory of God – the whole reason we are here on earth.

As we claim and operate in those promises we enter into a realm of God’s glory. A purpose far greater than anything known here on earth. We have the opportunity to walk in the heavenlies with saints and angels even while living out our lives here on earth in the midst of the turmoil. (Just like my daughter.) Talk about living above your means!

We don’t have in ourselves the means for peace, joy, grace, forgiveness, rest, strength, mercy, protection, encouragement, protection, supply…we’re bankrupt. He isn’t. He gives all we need for free!

My daughter is able to teach with patience and good humor because she goes to the treasury of God’s promises in the Person of Jesus and claims liberally all that He offers for her for practical everyday living.

It’s all available for you, too.

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2 Year Olds in Prison follow up

I have wanted to report back to you about my friend’s trip to Uganda and his ministry to those there. Especially the children in “remand centers” – which are really prisons. My friend and his team came back safely but weary.

Though lengthy, this is worth reading. I pray your heart will break as you see the photos and read the stories. But also that you will rejoice at the light of God that shined through this ministry into a very dark place. The needs are overwhelming but we know God’s grace is even more so.

Http://chadwickhawk.files.wordpress.com/2014/05/uganda2014_report_small.pdf

They did have a short-fall financially of $2800. If after reading this report you’d like to contribute I would suggest you do so. The address is contained in the report.

Thank you.

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Does Anyone Else Have a Problem with This?

The world seems upside down. That which my grandparents didn’t whisper about in the dark is now celebrated on TV. Those that have convictions are mocked, called names, punished. Does anyone else have a problem with this?

We pay taxes to a government that cannot control its spending. They use the money we send to do things we don’t want them to do. They waste so much of it. Does anyone else have a problem with this?

People who could work but choose not to get free stuff from the government and they call them “entitlements”! When did we become entitled? Does anyone else have a problem with his?

Flying the American flag on American soil as become intolerant. Patriots are called bigots or racists. Does anyone else have a problem with this?

What I call “weird”, “abnormal” is celebrated and I am supposed to feel wrong about my values. So-called entertainers push the envelope of decency to applause. Does anyone else have a problem with this?

Our government officials are no longer our public “servants” but want to be celebrities. Does anyone else have a problem with this?

Tolerance is permitted for everyone but Christians. Christians are attacked for their beliefs and convictions. Mohammed is to be revered but Jesus can be mocked. Does anyone else have a problem with this?

Even in my small town there is a camera at every stop light – all across the country these cameras have shown up. We are being watched. Does anyone else have a problem with this?

Common sense seems to have left the building. Does anyone else have a problem with this?

Our American history is being rewritten. God has been written off. A major political party boos God. Mike Huckabee wrote this this morning: It seems okay to spew hate as long as its directed toward people who hold to Biblical convictions. You can promote homosexuality, pornography, profanity, bigotry toward faith, degradation of women in explicit song lyrics, and recreational drug use with impunity, but God help you if you put in a good word for God. And God better help you because no one else will. Does anyone else have a problem with this?

As I write this I wonder who is watching. Will I be put on some list? As an American I am offended that I have these thoughts. Does anyone else have a problem with this?

I was a Target shopping for my granddaughter’s birthday. They would not let me check out without showing my ID. They could not tell me why. (I now think it was because of the hacking of the computers last December – but they should post a notice of their policy.) Will showing our ID now become commonplace except at the voting both. Does anyone else have a problem with this?

If we don’t begin to speak up soon…

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Singles and God

I was invited to speak at Inspire’s first ever single’s conference in Houston Friday night. I have seen my friend Anita Carmen’s vision grow from an idea to a reality in the last 11 years. I was one of their first speakers along with Beth Moore 11 years ago! I am so proud of what Anita is doing for God.

I got to meet Jonathan McReynolds, recording artist, who debuted at #3 on Billboard and Essence Magazine Top Gospel Artists to Watch in 2014! Such a sweet, humble guy. Loved him. <a
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And I met Michelle Bumgarner the “Mazda on the Road to Indy” race car driver. What a focused young woman who loves God!

I didn’t actually meet Kylie Bisutti, Winner of Victoria Secret’s Runway Angel competition and Author of “I’m No Angel: From Victoria Secret Model to Role Model” but we shared the podium. Such a sweet lady – sold out to Christ. In obedience to God she gave up her career. (I have reached and age and shape where I do not want to be in a room with a Victoria Secret model!!)

I was definitely the old lady in the bunch but I was able to give them what God has taught me. Experience counts!

I promised those there that I’d post what kind of husband the Lord is. I know I’ve posted it before…but it is worth repeating!

Psalm 104:34 “ My mediation of him shall be sweet: I will be glad in the Lord.”

In the Bible I read about what kind of spouse He is:
Powerful
Very handsome
He thinks all I do and say is fascinating
He tells me I am beautiful/handsome – perfect really
Loves me totally
Forgives me freely
Enjoys my company
Delights in my presence
Provides for my every need – even before I know I need it
Understands me perfectly
Listens to my every whisper
Never tires of me
Gives me beautiful clothes and jewelry
Is building me a mansion
He’s never grumpy
Exceedingly patient
His kindness is loving
He keeps everything in order
He’s never late but always on time
Never distracted when I am talking – pays close and full attention
Greets me at the door when I come home
Invites me into his arms
Holds my hand
Protects me
Carries my burdens
Smells good
Enjoys my music
Comforts me when I am sad
Soothes me when I am weary
Never lets me down
Never abandons me
Never rejects me
Never betrays me
Never belittles me
Wants me to be all I can be
He’s perfect in every way
He’s the best, safest, securest. And He always makes sure I get the best when I leave the choice to Him.

“For who in heaven can be compared unto the Lord? Who among the sons of the mighty can be likened unto the Lord?” Ps 89:6

Hallelujah!

He is risen!

Not only are we redeemed and death conquered but we have new life, new power, new joy, new peace, new love available – NOW!

Jesus won it all for us and gives it to us just for asking.

Now that’s something to celebrate!

Have a glorious celebration!

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Shame, Guilt, Regret

Why did Peter deny His Friend?

Psalm 1 says, “How blessed is the man who does not walk in the counsel of the wicked, nor stand in the path of sinners, nor sit in the seat of scoffers.”

When Jesus was arrested in the garden Peter did not flee the scene as had the others. He tried to defend Jesus by lashing out at Malchus, the high priest’s servant, cutting off his ear. As Jesus was led away to see Caiaphas, the high priest, Peter followed. (John chapter 18) Was it love and devotion?

My friend, James Robison told me once, “Often when our emotions get involved discernment leaves”. Perhaps this is what happened to Peter. He was walking in the crowd of the wicked. This crowd was easily swayed by mob mentality and emotion. We sometimes have a good intention; our motive is right, but we do it the wrong way and get ourselves in trouble.

At this point Peter could have left the crowd. He could have changed direction. How often our whole life changes on a simple choice. It becomes what I call a “hinge decision”.

But Peter not only walked with them – he stood with them and warmed himself by their fire. He was perhaps more concerned for his own comfort than what was happening to his dear friend. Luke (chapter 22) tells us that Peter sat with them to warm himself. It was there that the servant girl saw him in the fire light and recognized him. She told those around the fire that Peter had been with Jesus.

Peter denied he even knew Jesus. He denied he was “one of them” (disciples). An hour went by – time enough to change his course. A man said that Peter was a Galilean – he must have been with Jesus. Peter vehemently denied it. Before he even finished the denial, the cock crowed. At that point Jesus looked at Peter and Peter remembered that Jesus had predicted Peter would deny him.

At that point Peter left those by the fire. It was too late – the denials had taken place. Peter went out and wept bitterly. I cannot begin to imagine the sorrow and the regret. The “if only…”

I am not sure this compares well, but I have in mind the deep grief expressed and exhibited by the “Blade Runner”, Oscar Pistorius, this week in a South African court. Gut wrenching sobs. Sorrow. Regret. Shame. His life is forever changed.

Peter knew what he had done. Peter, at that point didn’t realize he would ever see Jesus alive again. Seemingly sentenced to a life of total grief and shame and regret.

God had another plan for Peter’s life!

But before we go there…

Let’s take note of where Peter positioned himself. He walked, stood and sat where he had no business being. Where are you walking today? Close to the edge? Flirting with sin? Where are you standing? Are your friends a good, godly influence? Or do they pull you down to their level so much so that you are comfortable with them. Is your spirit trying to get your attention to warn you. Listen. Take heed.

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He Knew What Was Coming

Jesus rode into Jerusalem amid adoring throngs hailing Him as “one who comes in the name of the Lord; blessed is the coming kingdom of our father David…” He was riding a crest of popularity. He went to the temple and looked around. What did He see? People busy, weary of their busyness. People trying hard to obey all the religious laws. People wanting to please God. People trying to stay out of the religious leaders’ watchful, critical eyes. Women being put upon. The sick, lame, blind being pushed out of the way. The poor were ignored.

He knew what was coming.

He saw a fig tree that was not bearing fruit and cursed it so that it withered. A fig tree puts out leaves and fruit at the same time. To find one with leaves only was unusual. Perhaps an illustration of so many – those that have the leaves of religiosity but no fruit. Those that have all the trappings but no life. He cursed the fig tree. It reminds me of the story Jesus told of those on the Judgment Day who say, “Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in Your name, and in Your name cast out demons and in Your name perform many miracles?” But He will say, “I never knew you, depart from me.”

He knew what was coming.

He challenged the temple practices of the money changers. He violently turned their tables over and cast them out – not even allowing people to carry products through the temple. He called for he temple to be a house of prayer. This angered the religious leaders so much that they began to seek a way to kill Him. They challenged Him with trick questions which He met by confronting them with themselves. Angering them further.

He knew what was coming.

I wonder what the disciples were thinking the next day. They probably were saying to themselves, “It’s about time! He is going to set up His kingdom and we’ll have a place in it! I wonder who will sit at His right hand. Oh, boy, we can’t wait to prove to all the naysayers that He was right all along. This is going to be great!”

They did not know what was coming.